Tighter than Cling Wrap

Are you “tight” with your things? How about your past? I had things down pat when I was living in my marriage. I had my life down to a turbulent science. Yes, my former partner was not the kindest person, but I knew where the mortgage money was coming from…and if I worked, I probaby knew where the grocery money was coming from as well. Things were bad, sometimes VERY BAD, but I had a family. A real life family. Forget the fact that we had a facade when we went out. We still were a family!  I was tight with my crazy life!

 I know say, “What a crock!”  I literally wasted 23 years of my life because I was attached to a false idea. An idea of a perfect family…an idea that I didn’t want to be divorced. An idea that my God wasn’t gracious. An idea that I couldn’t live without my former partner. Twenty-three years of crying into a pillow!  I repeat, “What a crock!”

 And then I was out! On my own in Toronto, with three semi-grown kids and a grandkid. (If you believe that your kids don’t pick up on your actions, I have stories for you!) What else could I be attached to? Oh yes, stuff! Even though I could part with many things, they were familiar to me, and comforted me in my new life. But, they were also a reminder of my past life and its negativity. These things could be used to help pay the rent, help fund tuition, pay for groceries…the list could go on. We may know that an object is not serving any real purpose in our lives, but we still hang on to it.  Why is that?

 For me, hanging on to my things was something that I started noticing was a problem. Soon after I left, I no longer owned a car or a house. All I had was my STUFF. Those were my possessions. They were all that I had. I couldn’t let them go! But I started to see how ridiculous that was, in light of the fact that I had two dining tables and one dining room. I had the dining table from my previous house, plus an antique one that I had gotten for a song. How dumb is that?

 After you leave a marriage, it is natural to want to hang on to things. You have lost so much. If the marriage was abusive, you lost a lot before you even left! Letting go of your attachment to things is a hard concept to grasp, but it is achievable. Letting go frees you to have other things come into your life. When you are hanging on to things, you are fearful that something will not replace it. You are operating from a place of lack. Detachment and release, however, function from abundance. You are saying, I am not afraid of letting this go because something else, and probably something even better, will take its place. Nature abhors a vacuum. If there is an empty space, it’s gonna get filled!

 I repeat, I am not saying that letting go is easy. It takes guts, and tremendous willpower. But I am learning each and every day, when I give~or let go~I get. Sometimes it is time, sometimes it’s things. Sometimes it’s a complete surprise of a generous gift. For instance, I have been volunteering for years with kids at a local school, never thinking anything of it. Recently, someone has decided to gift me her time to show me business tips. She is a seasoned businesswoman, so this is a fantastic opportunity. I let go of my time a few hours a week for the kids, and I believe that this is my reward. Giving financially to charities also brings similar rewards.  Nature must fill a vacuum.

 Are you tighter than Cling Wrap with your past, your time, your money, or your things? Let go! You will start to become more peaceful when you realize that there’s more than enough to go around. Besides, you cannot embrace something new with a clenched fist!

May Your Cup Always Be Full,

Emerging Princess

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Water For The Journey

Book Release PartyOctober 25th, 2013
The long-awaited release of Water For The Journey: 156 Days To Freedom. All day givaways and book release party!
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