Wacky Wednesday, 01/29/14

I love a funny video.  I hope this one gets you laughing today.  Remember, the week’s half-over!

Pursue Your Passion & Live a Legacy,

Stephanie, Renaissance Queen

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Friday Funday

Haven’t blogged in a few days.  Feeling a little haggard lately.  I saw this sweet diagram about love, and thought I’d pass it on.  Hope you enjoy it!

If the pic doesn’t show properly on your computer, here is the link:

http://www.quickmeme.com/p/3vs1hk

Pursue Your Passions & Live A Legacy,

Stephanie

10 Things I Learned About Business From Failed Romances

I’ve had a few failed romances over my lifetime.  I’ve been burned, badly, by a few of them.  Here are 10 things that I have learned, and how they apply to a business.  These views are mine!

1.  If You Don’t Treat Your Business Like Gold, No One Else Will.  Find the best products—that you can afford—to aid your business.  We all start somewhere, but using crappy methods will cause you to have to do things over.  And, as the saying goes, “If you don’t have the time to do things well the first time, when will you have the time to do it over?”

Likewise, if you don’t love and treat yourself like GOLD, people will treat you like aluminum foil, crumple you up, and throw you out for recycling.  You have to stand firm for what’s important to you.  Realize that you are Tiffany quality, and let the dollar-store people go!

2.  Be Proud Of What You Do.  Shout it from the rooftops.  Use Social Media.  Tell the world  about what you are bringing to the marketplace.   You’ve put a lot of blood, sweat and tears into this endeavour.  Make sure it showcases well.  (I do understand that you may not want people to know about an initial planning stage due to dream-stealers.  Yet, this does not mean that you are not proud of the business you are embarking on.)

Your romantic relationship should also make you proud.  When you love a great guy or gal, you want the world to know that this is your special person.  Secrets breed mistrust, and show that you may not be fully committed.  In the end, secrets will come to light…when you least expect it!

3.  Make Your Business A Priority.  Be Passionate about your business.  Put your heart and soul into it.  If you put part-time effort into it, you will get part-time results.  Your business should be a priority in your life.  When you put things before your bottom line—like browsing the internet, cleaning the office, or procrastinating on tasks that will help propel your business forward—you will suffer financially.  I know.  I’ve been there!

When you are in a serious relationship, your special person becomes a priority in your life.  If you are not passionate about seeing your mate, spending time with them, or making them a priority, you will lose them.  The question then is, “Why are you even in the relationship?”  Eventually, they will even come before your kids (if you have any).  I believe however, it should be after God (or whoever is your Higher Power).  God first, then relationship, business/kids/family (you sort out that order).  Points 1-3 seem like they are the same thing, but they are not.  They work hand-in-hand.

4.  Your Values Matter.  If you want to have weekends off, don’t start off working on weekends, unless you know for sure it’s only for a season.  Bending the rules, “just this once”, can lead to a myriad of chain reactions that you may regret.  It’s too hard to backtrack once you have bent the rules.

Don’t compromise your values for love.  When you compromise your values, you will be out of alignment with your moral compass, core and driving needs.  You will become unhappy.  It’s just a matter of time.  If you don’t stand for something, you will fall for anything!

5.  Reward Yourself.  When you have accomplished some milestone, give yourself a gift.  I mean really get into, and FEEL joy of receiving the gift—even if it’s something small when you start out.  This action will help you remember the positive vibes of accomplishing the goal.  You will want to recreate that feeling—and accomplish more goals.  One success begets another.

Reward your partner for kind deeds.  When they do something nice for you, tell them so.  If you see something that they like and you can purchase it, do so.  Who doesn’t love an unexpected gift?  (Again, I stress that you HAVE the finances to purchase it!)  I have yet to see someone who is unhappy to be spoiled and doted on (I didn’t say smothered!)  We love to be rewarded.  Nuff said!

Courtesy Free Digital Downloads

Courtesy Free Digital Downloads

6.  Honesty Is The Best Policy.  No one likes a crooked business(wo)man.  Keep everything above-board, and you will have less to try to hide at tax time.

Honesty is the best policy in relationships as well.  No one likes a cheater and a liar.  And if it’s you, stop!

7.  Get the Family Involved.  In both business and your relationship, when you are getting started, you may need to enlist the help of your family.  If your family is not on side with your business, they will sabotage your efforts.  It may not be openly.  If you are spending long hours working your business, or if you have moved into another income bracket, resentments may also arise.  How dare you leave them behind?  If you need to spend a season on a project, and it will affect your significant other, or your family, make sure they know beforehand.  Arrange a reward for the completion of the project.  Save face before you have to kiss feet.

8.  Get Help.  It sucks to do business alone!  It’s lonely, and you end up living in a vacuum.  Reach out to others in your same field through associations, or Linkedin/FB Groups.  Coaching is THE best way to catapult your business forward.  The accountability has a way of getting your butt in gear!

Before you need help with your relationship, I think it’s helpful to connect with other successful couples.  Conversely, reading about how the opposite sex operates is also helpful.  I have been reading about successful relationships for a while.  Each bit of information gives more insight as to how relationships work.  And I’ll never “arrive”.  That knowledge alone keeps me wanting to learn more.

9.  Give Back.  You started somewhere, and it probably wasn’t at the top.  Before your business is even at the million-dollar mark, start giving a little here and there.  It can be time or finances, but there is never an over-abundance of volunteers.  I have yet to see an organization say, “Please don’t help us”.  What is your pet charity?  How can you help them now?

I believe that volunteering couples help keep selfishness at bay.  Volunteering can strengthen a relationship, and bring a couple closer together.  (Providing there are no hidden agendas.)  Emotional experiences strengthen bonds, and leave a lasting impression on our lives.

10.  It Won’t Be Easy, But It Will Be Worth It.  Anything worth having is worth fighting for, in business, and in love.  If you believe in the business, (or the person you love), you are in integrity, and it is worth fighting for…FIGHT!  We humans—myself included—give up way too easily!  Fight for what you love!

I learned these things the hard way.  My hope is that you glean some nuggets of truth from these points.

Pursue Your Passions & Live A Legacy!

Stephanie, Emerging Princess

www.createdtoexcel.ca

The Game Changer

Every now and then, something happens in our lives, and we are changed forever.  It can be the death of a loved one, the loss of a job, a divorce, the birth of a child…It seems like we constantly come across things that challenge our very existence as human beings.

Yet, isn’t that what life is made of?  Isn’t life made up of the birth of children, the graduation from college, the marriages, the divorces, loss of jobs, and finally death?  Why, then, are we so unable to deal with life?  Or is it that some events affect us more than others, and knock us over the head like a two-by-four?

I deduce that it is the latter.  I believe that sometimes an event affects us so deeply that it becomes a Game Changer in our life.  Game Changer is defined as: an event, idea, or procedure that effects a significant shift in the current way of doing or thinking about something.  Say that three times fast!  Sometimes, I believe that Game Changers don’t even have to be huge.  It can just be the realization that you do not want to do things the same way anymore.  So, how does one get past the Game Changer life event?  I believe that there are many ways, and I’ll touch on a few of them here:

  • Stop, Drop & Roll:  Analyzation can be the first step in getting past the Game Changer event.  What brought you to this place in time?  Was it preventable?  What can you learn from the event?  What are the steps that you now wish to take now to remedy this situation?  Having a plan can often be half the battle won.
  • Gratitude:  Holla!  I know when I am grumpy, what to trace it back to…un*grate*ful*ness!  It seems like such a small thing, but gratitude can bring about a huge change in a person’s life.  I have been journaling for most of my adult life in one form or another.  I have been solidly gratitude journaling for about 5 years.  When I am not grateful, I become critical of my life, as well as other people. I also become lethargic, and I lose my joy.  There are many different ways to do gratitude journaling, but that is not the jist of my writing today.  The idea is to write!  Being grateful for three things each day will start to shift your negative head space.  You may not believe it, but it is very true.  Try it before you go about your day, or if you are morning-challenged like myself, use a few minutes before bed to get your gratitude fix.  Before long, you’ll find things to be grateful for besides your family, food and shelter!  😉
  • Share The Load:  there are people somewhere who have been through what you have.  I am a consummate stuffer.  I keep my feelings to myself, don’t like to talk about my problems, and I’ve grown up with the mantra of “people don’t have to know yer business” ringing in my head.  Although some things need to be kept private (or shared only with trusted close friends), sharing some of the things that you are going through helps lighten the load.  If it is a serious Game Changer, you may wish to reach out to a counselor.  Emotional health is end goal. The best people that I have ever reached out to are coaches (not just because I am one).  When I work with a coach, the accountability factor helps me move forward past the event, and on to accomplishing my goals in record time.  Consider getting a Coach to help you, and if it’s not possible, reach out to an accountability partner or group.
  •  Pursue Passion!  Often, just the event alone will open ones’ eyes up to the fact that you were just going through the motions…doing the same-old same-old, living numb.  Why go to a job if you are not passionate about it, or do anything if we are not putting our all into it?  When given a chance to examine our life, we realize that we have let much of our life slip away without embracing it, without doing what we really wanted, without Living a Legacy or being Passionate.

This is precisely what happened to me, except, I had a series of Game Changers (lucky me!).  I had things that I went through that opened my eyes to the fact that half of my life had passed, and I had not embraced it.  I had not done many of the things on my bucket list.  To top things off, I certainly wasn’t living Passionately, much less Living a Legacy (see previous blog posts).

My Game Changers showed me that a change had to be made.  I decided that life was to be embraced!  I chose to have only good days.  I enjoyed people, food, nature, events~whatever came my way, I found a way to get the good out of it.  Yes, even a car accident!  I started connecting with people through hugs (and became known for them), and mindfully getting past superficial chit-chat to finding out what was their bliss.  Along the way, I researched what made me tick, what made my heart sing, how I wanted to give back to my community, and what I wanted my Legacy to look like.  I discovered that forgiveness is a huge factor in happiness, and I wrote a manual to help my Coaching clients work through their own forgiveness issues.  Over the course of 4 years, I created a program that I now call Passion Posse, and started embarking on my Preferred Passion Path~the final piece of living Passionately.

And it’s a Game Changer!  To show some of the steps that I took to get on the Passion Path, ladies (guys can join, but I am focusing on lady problems!), I invite you to join me on December 11th, 2013, as I present a webinar called:  Dumping the Numb:  7 Steps to a More Passionate Life.  Who is this webinar for?  It’s for the professional woman, either in business or an entrepreneur.  Maybe you have been superwoman for a long time.  Perhaps you have a family, maybe you are single…either way, the passion has gone out of your life.  These 7 Steps will help give you some tools to help put some pep back in your step.

I am releasing details about this webinar today because it is December 6th, a very significant day here in Canada.  I am a survivor of Domestic Abuse.  I want to honour the fallen women from Montreal who died senselessly so many years ago on this date.  I will also be revealing a partnership with three organizations connected to DV~December 6 Fund, hEr VOLUTION and World Vision~ but you’ll have to get on the training call to know the details!

You can register for the webinar here.  If you miss it, you can get it on replay, but you have to be registered to get the replay.

Remember:  Pursue Your Passion & Live a Legacy

Stephanie

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The Sun And The Rain And the Apple Seed

With the sporadic weather that has plagued the earth, and in honour of the US Thanksgiving, I thought I’d re-post this popular blog.  It was originally posted in March, 2012.  Although it doesn’t have to do with a big meal, it has everything to do with an attitude of gratitude.  May you have a safe and happy Thanksgiving Day!

grat-i-tude noun:  the quality or feeling of being thankful

English: Photo showing some of the aspects of ...

English: Photo showing some of the aspects of a traditional US Thanksgiving day dinner. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I live in Canada. Our country is immensely wide and somewhat deep as well. However, from coast to coast, we have one thing in common: We find some way to communicate our displeasure with the weather! It’s almost like an ongoing joke.

If it’s a winter’s day, and it’s -15°C, we will complain that it is a harsh winter. (That is about 5°Farenheit, by the way!) “It’s probably warmer in Nunavut, when will this dreaded winter be done?” If it’s summertime and 30°C+ a humidex factor (91°F), we’ll say that the summer is sooo hot this year.

I’ve decided to take a different approach. I try not to have bad days, so I decided to be thankful for whatever weather that we are having at the time. This winter was incredibly mild, I was thankful that it wasn’t -15°C. We did have some really cold days, I was grateful that the sun was shining. There was one bitterly cold day that it also snowed. I got chilled because I had to run errands that day. When I got home, I made a big pot of soup and went under the covers. That day, I was grateful for a comfortable bed to snuggle up under.

Last week in Southern Ontario, we had a warm spell. The temperatures got up to 25° (77°F). We had to look at the calendar to be reminded that it was the middle of March, and not June. Our normal temperatures are about 9°C (47°F) for this time of year. The magnolias, crocuses and daffodils started blooming. I bared my legs and wore skirts. There were days that it was raining because, after all, it is spring. True to form, I heard people complaining that it was going to rain. IT WAS 25° DEGREES, AFTER ALL! Sigh…

Well, we are now in a “cold snap”, according to the weather forecast. Today I woke up, and the temperature here is not getting any higher than 3°C (37°F). It will be unseasonably COLD today. I took a walk, and the magnolias, which were ready to open last week, have turned an ugly brown colour because of the extreme cold. The flowers that were blooming so beautifully just days ago, are now being covered up for protection. However, it is SUNNY!

Erratic weather is a definite possibility, I do acknowledge that. The weather may bring droughts or tornadoes. Hurricanes and floods may be something that has touched your life. I am in no way minimizing the effects of disasters on you or anyone else’s life. However, I know from experience that, the faster I get out of the victim stage, the faster my recovery.

I spent so many years not being happy because of my difficult marital situation. Now I am embracing all that life has to offer, even rainy days. If it didn’t rain, the daffodils would not look as beautiful. Each day, I find something to be grateful for, and oftentimes, the weather is part of my gratitude journalling. If it’s winter and raining, I’m thankful that it is warm enough not to be snowing. If it’s winter and cold, it is usually sunny, and for that, I am also grateful. If it’s 30°C, it’s definitely not snowing, and for that, I am exceptionally grateful!

What’s the weather like in your neck of the woods? Can you find something for which you are grateful?

May Your Cup Always be full,

Stephanie~Emerging Princess

www.stephanietitusandrews.com

The Success Indicator

Today’s post is courtesy of Jeff Moore of My Everyday Power

mistakes

Pursue Your Passion!  Live Your Legacy

Stephanie, Emerging Princess

Monday Motivation: Actions Express Priorities

Said by the famous peace-maker Ghandi, this saying has been etched into my brain this last week. It is a screen-saver on my daughter’s computer, actually. I am glad that I exposed my girls to motivational sayings early in life (and I believe they are too!). This simple phrase has pierced my core, so that I have started examining my life. And as “Socrates” said, “An unexamined life is not worth living”.

Digging deep and examining…Do I really want to go there? There will be many things that I do not want to see! What if I examine my business? Am I on Social Media more than I am doing the important things? Am I really going after my goals with gusto? Can I do more? Am I dreaming big enough?

What about my personal life…do I tell my kids “I love you” every day? Am I hugging and kissing them? And my special relationships…do I give what I want? Am I letting people know how special they are to me? Am I keeping my word? Or do I brush people off with a “waddevah meh!”? Am I holding on to the past, and not allowing the future to have a chance? Am I living and giving with passion?

Shall I stop there? I think not~I’m on a roll! If I say that I want to be wealthy, do I read up on what makes wealth? Am I saving money? Am I investing? If I can’t say “Amen”, I gotta say “ouch”! My actions express what is the priority in my life. And what of my health? Do I say that I want to shed weight, and exercise is not part of my routine, nor do I even buy fresh foods? Then, doing things that hinder weight loss is my priority.

I’m on a mission to create a passionate life. One of the most wasted things on this planet is time…we waste time on Social Media, watching TV and playing video games, then complain that we don’t have enough time to spare. In our relationships, we waste time holding on to bitterness, anger, unforgiveness, and a need to be right, rather than happy. Then we wonder why we are alone. Wasted time…a window into priorities.

I’m awake now, what about you?

Pursue your Passion, Live Your Legacy!

Stephanie, Emerging Princess

Monday Motivation~July 8th, 2013

I have been reading a lot about beliefs, and how they affect our actions. Here is a quote from a book that I’m reading right now:

“People don’t buy things, they buy people. Why would someone buy you? Do you think that you are valuable enough? Whatever you believe, they will buy.
Are you selling yourself short? Are you selling what you want to be selling?”
~Mark Victor Hansen

Don’t sell yourself short!

Pursue Your Passion, Live Your Legacy!

Stephanie, Emerging Princess

Foodie Friday~Coconut Pudding

I haven’t done a Foodie Friday post in a long while. I have been experimenting a lot with foods since my SBO surgery. Large amounts of milk don’t sit well in my digestive system, so I use coconut milk. I have also been working with chia and flax seeds to thicken things. I use them in my smoothies, and I’ve also made chocolate puddings with them. However, I wanted a coconut pudding that wasn’t brown. I needed it desperately, as I was no longer eating yogourt (something I never thought I would give up). Being a West-Indian, I also don’t measure often~I just eye-ball. I can almost never give a person a recipe unless I’ve done it a few times. This Coconut Pudding is very easy…And it tastes delish! I used psyllium instead of the seeds to thicken it, and just a bit of sugar. If it isn’t sweet enough for your tastes, add more (I don’t like too sweet). Keep in mind, it will never be quite the same as a “normal” pudding. But this one is nice consistency. I use canned coconut milk. I haven’t tried making my own quite as yet.

COCONUT PUDDING
1 12-oz (375ml) can coconut milk (without additives)
1 tbs virgin coconut oil, melted and cooled
1 tbs. cane sugar
2-1/2 tbs psyllium (I buy at the bulk food store)

Pour coconut milk into a blender. Add the rest of ingredients and blend on low for 2 minutes. Turn onto high and blend for another minute. Pour into a glass container, cover and chill for 3-4 hours or overnight. Stir it up before serving.

Perfect over fresh fruit!

Perfect over fresh fruit!

Like I said, I use it as my yogourt substitute. I put it on fruit, and add some granola (like in pic). Or, I just have a small bowl on its own. The coconut oil helps to satisfy your appetite, so a little goes a long way!

Enjoy,

May Your Cup Always Be Full,

Stephanie, Emerging Princess

7 Reasons Why I Love the 4th of July

While most people celebrate the 4th of July for America’s Independence, I celebrate it for entirely different reasons. A few significant things happened to me on this day. I am very grateful because these things affect many other aspects of my life. Here’s why the 4th of July means so much to me. To be fair, America did make the list! 😉

1. America, & The World’s Longest Unmanned Border
I am grateful that I live beside/above the United States of America. I love that we can take day-trips to Buffalo to shop (from the Tdot). I love that we can be Snow Birds to Florida, Arizona or any other warm winter spot. I love that we share so much history with you (although some were through wars! LOL) We do have the world’s longest unmanned border. It means that there is no military at any of our border crossings. To bring it home, no one with a gun is standing guard at the Peace or Rainbow Bridges. That is a great feat. We should be very proud!

2. New Lease on Life #1
My New Life began four years ago today. After strategizing for 156 Days, I finally left a 23-year, verbally abusive marriage. Has it been easy? No! Will I go back? Not a chance! I thoroughly enjoy my new life, challenges and all. I am now an advocate for Domestic Violence. I’m very, very happy that I left when I did. Wished I did it sooner. Grateful that I’ve been given a chance to redesign my future.

3. New Lease on Life #2
For those of you who don’t know it yet, “Children Learn What They Live”. I believe this so strongly that I have put the poem in one of my books, and it’s part of a talk that I give. My daughter followed my example. Thank God, she learned from my mistakes~and her own~ and is living free from abuse as well.

4. My Kids & My Grandson
My kids went through more than any little girls should. They saw their Mother crying A LOT! They stuck by me, giving me hugs and crying along side me on the bad days. I’m forever grateful for the times that we spent bonding in Sista 1’s room, and laughing over silliness. As a result of those times, we can make up the wildest stories about the most mundane events! I thank God for these beautiful young ladies.

When my Grandson was born, we women were determined that the “Little Man” would have a very centered start to his life. He essentially has 5 Mamas (his paternal grandmother has joined the fray). Manners are essential, and he loves to hug and love on people (after he’s checked you out). I’m thankful that his history does not determine his future!

5. New Lease on Life #3
I am very, very grateful that the doctors figured out that I had a Small Bowel Obstruction on July 3rd, 2012, and not on July 4th, 2012. See, if they didn’t do the surgery a year ago today, I wouldn’t be making this blog. It’s only after I recuperated, that I realized the severity of SBO. I am grateful to the doctor who wouldn’t let me leave the hospital when I was tired of waiting~yes, I actually wanted to go home, even though I had not eaten in 3 days. I am really happy to be alive!

6. Free Healthcare: T&T, Canada
So, free Healthcare has been a debate for many countries. I am so thankful that I didn’t have to worry. If my SBO surgery was required in Canada, the Healthcare is free. It so happened that I had the surgery in Trinidad. I’m a native…it was FREE. There are two eerie things that happened with this, though. First, the day before I left on my trip, I was asked if I wanted travel insurance. I refused saying, “I’m not going to Trinidad to get sick!” H’mm, interesting. The second is that I had a stop-over in Miami. Had I gotten ill in Miami, it would have been a whole different story. I’m VErY grateful for free Healthcare!

7. Freedom, Plain & Simple
I can worship my God, sing, dance, or not. I can walk the streets freely. I can go to school~or not. I can wear booty shorts~NOT! The list can go on and on. There is NOTHING quite like living in a FREE country. NOTHING. It’s only when you go to a country that’s restrictive that you can really appreciate it. I’m not American. We Canadians celebrated our Independence Day on July 1st. Yet, I am very aware that we both are very, very grateful for our freedom.

Last week, I discovered my “WHY”. I knew it in my belly, but I got my AHA moment then. Here it is: “I have almost lost something precious to me (my life). I am on a mission (compelled) to tell people that they cannot go through life numb!” Find your passion and pursue it! Live your Legacy!

A different post, for a special day! God Bless Us, Every One!

May Your Cup Always Be Full,

Stephanie, Emerging Princess

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Water For The Journey

Book Release PartyOctober 25th, 2013
The long-awaited release of Water For The Journey: 156 Days To Freedom. All day givaways and book release party!
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