The Game Changer

Every now and then, something happens in our lives, and we are changed forever.  It can be the death of a loved one, the loss of a job, a divorce, the birth of a child…It seems like we constantly come across things that challenge our very existence as human beings.

Yet, isn’t that what life is made of?  Isn’t life made up of the birth of children, the graduation from college, the marriages, the divorces, loss of jobs, and finally death?  Why, then, are we so unable to deal with life?  Or is it that some events affect us more than others, and knock us over the head like a two-by-four?

I deduce that it is the latter.  I believe that sometimes an event affects us so deeply that it becomes a Game Changer in our life.  Game Changer is defined as: an event, idea, or procedure that effects a significant shift in the current way of doing or thinking about something.  Say that three times fast!  Sometimes, I believe that Game Changers don’t even have to be huge.  It can just be the realization that you do not want to do things the same way anymore.  So, how does one get past the Game Changer life event?  I believe that there are many ways, and I’ll touch on a few of them here:

  • Stop, Drop & Roll:  Analyzation can be the first step in getting past the Game Changer event.  What brought you to this place in time?  Was it preventable?  What can you learn from the event?  What are the steps that you now wish to take now to remedy this situation?  Having a plan can often be half the battle won.
  • Gratitude:  Holla!  I know when I am grumpy, what to trace it back to…un*grate*ful*ness!  It seems like such a small thing, but gratitude can bring about a huge change in a person’s life.  I have been journaling for most of my adult life in one form or another.  I have been solidly gratitude journaling for about 5 years.  When I am not grateful, I become critical of my life, as well as other people. I also become lethargic, and I lose my joy.  There are many different ways to do gratitude journaling, but that is not the jist of my writing today.  The idea is to write!  Being grateful for three things each day will start to shift your negative head space.  You may not believe it, but it is very true.  Try it before you go about your day, or if you are morning-challenged like myself, use a few minutes before bed to get your gratitude fix.  Before long, you’ll find things to be grateful for besides your family, food and shelter!  😉
  • Share The Load:  there are people somewhere who have been through what you have.  I am a consummate stuffer.  I keep my feelings to myself, don’t like to talk about my problems, and I’ve grown up with the mantra of “people don’t have to know yer business” ringing in my head.  Although some things need to be kept private (or shared only with trusted close friends), sharing some of the things that you are going through helps lighten the load.  If it is a serious Game Changer, you may wish to reach out to a counselor.  Emotional health is end goal. The best people that I have ever reached out to are coaches (not just because I am one).  When I work with a coach, the accountability factor helps me move forward past the event, and on to accomplishing my goals in record time.  Consider getting a Coach to help you, and if it’s not possible, reach out to an accountability partner or group.
  •  Pursue Passion!  Often, just the event alone will open ones’ eyes up to the fact that you were just going through the motions…doing the same-old same-old, living numb.  Why go to a job if you are not passionate about it, or do anything if we are not putting our all into it?  When given a chance to examine our life, we realize that we have let much of our life slip away without embracing it, without doing what we really wanted, without Living a Legacy or being Passionate.

This is precisely what happened to me, except, I had a series of Game Changers (lucky me!).  I had things that I went through that opened my eyes to the fact that half of my life had passed, and I had not embraced it.  I had not done many of the things on my bucket list.  To top things off, I certainly wasn’t living Passionately, much less Living a Legacy (see previous blog posts).

My Game Changers showed me that a change had to be made.  I decided that life was to be embraced!  I chose to have only good days.  I enjoyed people, food, nature, events~whatever came my way, I found a way to get the good out of it.  Yes, even a car accident!  I started connecting with people through hugs (and became known for them), and mindfully getting past superficial chit-chat to finding out what was their bliss.  Along the way, I researched what made me tick, what made my heart sing, how I wanted to give back to my community, and what I wanted my Legacy to look like.  I discovered that forgiveness is a huge factor in happiness, and I wrote a manual to help my Coaching clients work through their own forgiveness issues.  Over the course of 4 years, I created a program that I now call Passion Posse, and started embarking on my Preferred Passion Path~the final piece of living Passionately.

And it’s a Game Changer!  To show some of the steps that I took to get on the Passion Path, ladies (guys can join, but I am focusing on lady problems!), I invite you to join me on December 11th, 2013, as I present a webinar called:  Dumping the Numb:  7 Steps to a More Passionate Life.  Who is this webinar for?  It’s for the professional woman, either in business or an entrepreneur.  Maybe you have been superwoman for a long time.  Perhaps you have a family, maybe you are single…either way, the passion has gone out of your life.  These 7 Steps will help give you some tools to help put some pep back in your step.

I am releasing details about this webinar today because it is December 6th, a very significant day here in Canada.  I am a survivor of Domestic Abuse.  I want to honour the fallen women from Montreal who died senselessly so many years ago on this date.  I will also be revealing a partnership with three organizations connected to DV~December 6 Fund, hEr VOLUTION and World Vision~ but you’ll have to get on the training call to know the details!

You can register for the webinar here.  If you miss it, you can get it on replay, but you have to be registered to get the replay.

Remember:  Pursue Your Passion & Live a Legacy

Stephanie

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The Success Indicator

Today’s post is courtesy of Jeff Moore of My Everyday Power

mistakes

Pursue Your Passion!  Live Your Legacy

Stephanie, Emerging Princess

Monday Motivation: Actions Express Priorities

Said by the famous peace-maker Ghandi, this saying has been etched into my brain this last week. It is a screen-saver on my daughter’s computer, actually. I am glad that I exposed my girls to motivational sayings early in life (and I believe they are too!). This simple phrase has pierced my core, so that I have started examining my life. And as “Socrates” said, “An unexamined life is not worth living”.

Digging deep and examining…Do I really want to go there? There will be many things that I do not want to see! What if I examine my business? Am I on Social Media more than I am doing the important things? Am I really going after my goals with gusto? Can I do more? Am I dreaming big enough?

What about my personal life…do I tell my kids “I love you” every day? Am I hugging and kissing them? And my special relationships…do I give what I want? Am I letting people know how special they are to me? Am I keeping my word? Or do I brush people off with a “waddevah meh!”? Am I holding on to the past, and not allowing the future to have a chance? Am I living and giving with passion?

Shall I stop there? I think not~I’m on a roll! If I say that I want to be wealthy, do I read up on what makes wealth? Am I saving money? Am I investing? If I can’t say “Amen”, I gotta say “ouch”! My actions express what is the priority in my life. And what of my health? Do I say that I want to shed weight, and exercise is not part of my routine, nor do I even buy fresh foods? Then, doing things that hinder weight loss is my priority.

I’m on a mission to create a passionate life. One of the most wasted things on this planet is time…we waste time on Social Media, watching TV and playing video games, then complain that we don’t have enough time to spare. In our relationships, we waste time holding on to bitterness, anger, unforgiveness, and a need to be right, rather than happy. Then we wonder why we are alone. Wasted time…a window into priorities.

I’m awake now, what about you?

Pursue your Passion, Live Your Legacy!

Stephanie, Emerging Princess

Wacky Wednesday~03/20/13

My friend in England posted this, and I thought it quite funny.  Enjoy!

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May Your Cup Always Be Full,

Stephanie, Emerging Princess

4am Rant

Ugh!  Ok, so sometimes God wakes me up at “ungodly” hours and talks…I have no choice but to listen, or I’ll never get back to sleep!  This is for someone out there.  Please pass on if you feel the need to.  I’ll warn you, today’s blog is more like a rant!

ID-10089637So often, we believe our sunglasses that we happen to be wearing.  Our sunglasses are the paradigms through which we see our world (Brian Klemmer).  Some sunglasses are given to us at birth~like our ethnicity~others are things or thought patterns that we pick up and keep telling ourselves.  These sunglasses often are not true, and they can be so damaging to our life’s progress.  Things like:

~I am not strong enough

~This is how I am/ I was born this way

~I’m not blessed with a beautiful body like you are

~I’ll never get out of debt

~I’m not smart like you

~My whole family is like this

~I can’t do that

~I’m not pretty/handsome enough

Who told you?

These are all sunglasses (of negativity) that we allow to dictate our lives.  One day (hopefully), we wake up to find that these sunglasses are a hindrance to us.  We inspect our lives, and discover that there were the “woulda”, “coulda” and “shouldas” that stared us in the eye…missed opportunities that, if we had stepped out of our narrow view of our life, “woulda”, “shoulda” and “coulda” been so amazing!  If others have accomplished great things, surely we can too!

[By the way, these paradigms can be~ and often are~well-meaning loved ones who don’t want to see us get hurt.  They sometimes give us “wise council” that reflects the world through their sunglasses.  We are then held back when we try to please them, and heed their well-meaning advice.]

Are you ready to take off your sunglasses?

Are you ready to prove the naysayers wrong?

Are you ready to live a life bigger than you’ve ever imagined?

Isn’t it about time?

May Your Cup Always Be Full,

Stephanie, Emerging Princess

Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie Yellow Polka-Dot Bikini

It’s Theological Thursday.  As is the custom, here is a post from a Christian point of view.  Enjoy!

I remember the day as if it was yesterday.  I was warned, but nothing prepared me for what I saw that day.

A few days before, I lay on a hospital bed in the emergency ward, preparing for surgery.  I had developed a condition, a Small Bowel Obstruction, which required emergency surgery.  The doctor explained what he was going to do, and where they were going to cut.  I looked at the Doctor, mortified.

Surgery

Surgery (Photo credit: Army Medicine)

“Can’t you cut across my belly, below my belly-button?” I asked.

“No, that’s not possible,” the gentle Doctor quietly responded.

Well, when they got to the surgical floor, I prayed that the situation would change.  My procedure was successful (or I wouldn’t be writing this blog! 😉  ).  A day later, a nurse came to change my dressing.  Most of my stomach area had gauze or surgical tape.  I eagerly awaited the revelation of where my actual scars were.  As the nurse worked and explained what she was doing, I peeked.  I would eventually be doing her job when I was released.  As the gauze was taken off, I gasped.  I had been cut from my sternum, past my belly-button, all the way down to—well I couldn’t tell.  I couldn’t see that far!  My hopes of a low-lying scar were dashed against a rock, and broken into a million pieces!

“Who would want a scarred body like this?” I thought.  Turning to the nurse, I said,

“Oooh gosh, look at dat!”

“Girl, yuh had may-jah belly sur-dree”, she replied.

Not only was the surgery a surprise, I was also in a foreign country.  I was in the second week of a vacation to my birthplace, Trinidad.  It didn’t take me long to revert to being a “Trini” again—embracing the slower pace of life, and the sing-song method of speaking.

A few days later, I was released from the hospital.  During the next couple of weeks, I had some major fights with God about my scar.  It was a bone of contention during many of my prayer sessions.  I believe that it even started sowing the seed of ingratitude in my heart.  I was upset that now, I couldn’t wear an “Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weenie” bikini of any colour.

One day, I came to my senses and thought,

“Hold up!  This is ridiculous!  You have borne three children.  Your belly has been stretched to the maximum.  You have all the rivers of the world etched into your belly as proof!  There’s no way under the sun, that you’ll even ever go out in public in a bikini!”

That was a huge turning point for me.  Perhaps being angry at the scar was a way of taking my mind off the seriousness of the surgery.  Either way, I was finally able to thank the Lover Of My Soul for creating my body to be the wonderful machine that it was.  I was grateful that I was able to bear three wonderful children and nourish them.  I had strong legs, hands that worked, and a sound mind.

I looked back at the events surrounding my surgery, and they had God’s hand written all over them.  My room-mates were all Christians.  Visitors provided prayer coverage, and worship music was constantly playing.  I was surrounded by relatives who loved and cared for me.  This included a prayer-warrior aunt, who mustered up the support from my childhood church.  I had the surgery in a fabulous teaching hospital, with the head registrar leading my team of doctors.  I was able to have the surgery for free, as I was born there.  And when I was released into the care of my relatives, I didn’t have to lift a finger.  My laundry was done for me, my food prepared…that would not have been the case had I been in my own house.  This is the first time in my life that I was truly pampered.  Fussing over an “Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weenie Yellow Polka-Dot Bikini” seemed so puerile.

Recovery was a challenge, I won’t lie.  This surgery really changed my life.  Each day I’m thankful for my health.  I look at my “bikini” line”, and I’m well-aware that God saved me from the jaws of death.  The Lover Of My Soul has a great plan for my life.  I will reap my heavenly rewards, after I shake off this broken-temporal body.

What life-changing (near-death?) experience have you survived?  Please share…

May Your Cup Always Be Full,

Stephanie, Emerging Princess

 

 

Theological Thursday, Late Edition

Duh!

You know what?  I hate being told, “I told you so”!  Or realizing that I had been in a similar situation before, and it didn’t turn out then…What makes me believe that things would be different this time?  There is a saying that goes, “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over, expecting different results”.

When it comes to choosing a life partner, I have seen this in living colour.  A friend has made a bad choice as a boyfriend, and what do you do, you turn around and date someone just like him or worse.  Another girlfriend leaves an abusive husband, and her daughter becomes involved with someone like her father, even though she swore she would never do it.  What is our affinity to doing really dumb things?  Don’t we believe that God loves us enough to send a truly wonderful person our way?

“I want to do what is good, but I don’t. I don’t want to do what is wrong, but I do it anyway. ” (Romans 7:15)  Holla!  Wut is dis?  Paul was one of the biggest pillars of our faith.  He wrote a large part of the New Testament, for goodness sake.  Yet, there were times when he had  “the thorn in my flesh” which  kept him humble.  There has been much speculation over what the “thorn” was.  Wouldn’t it be cool to find out that it was a “who”?!  😛

Why DO we do dumb things?

Why DO we do dumb things?

 

We fail, and we fail again.  We are fallen creatures.  The Lover of My Soul desires for us to have a passionate relationship with Him.  It does grieve Him when we fall, as it puts distance between the Creator and the created.  Repentance restores that relationship, and He remembers our sin no more.  We may have to deal with the ramifications of the action, though.

I have become an avid student of life.  Life is FANTASTIC!  God wants to take us to higher and deeper levels with Him~despite the fact that it sounds like a contradiction.

This post is brief:  A full life happens when you fall, repent, and let the Love of Jesus pull you back to where you can hear His voice again.

May Your Cup Always Be Full,

Stephanie, Emerging Princess

www.createdtoexcel.ca

Wacky Wednesday, Again

Ever had a day like this???

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Tuesday Inspiration…

Speak Out!

May Your Cup Always Be Full,

Stephanie, Emerging Princess

Foodie Friday

Cocoa butter

Cocoa butter (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Although it’s Foodie Friday, today’s entry is not really food (although most ingredients are edible).  It’s more like a recipe for great winter hands.  I love when my hands are hydrated.  Dry hands, especially in the winter, are not my fave thing.  For years, I have made various concoctions of creams to help keep my skin soft.  I even came up with a belly cream for my daughter to use to prevent stretch marks when she was pregnant with my grandson. It worked~she doesn’t have a single striae there.  She doesn’t even look like she had a baby! 😥  (I really should start writing some of this stuff down, as people always comment on how well my creams work.)  And since I’m on more of a health-kick since my surgery, today’s feature was right up my alley.

I was really happy when I found this hard lotion recipe.  I added more coconut oil and cocoa butter because brown hands can handle~and often need~more “grease”.  Fiddle around with the recipe.  Make 1 little bar, stick it in the freezer and test it out.  If you don’t like it, melt it down and keep working until you like it.  Everyone has different tolerance levels for moisture & oil on their hands.

The original recipe was from one of my fave sites, Made On.

In a double boiler, melt equal amounts of beeswax, shea butter and coconut oil.  Stir until fully melted.  Pour into moulds and enjoy!  I used paper muffin cups for larger ones (1/4 full) and plastic ice cube trays for ones that I put in my purse.  For different fragrances, add a few drops of essential oils, such as vanilla, to smell your preference.  (I made ylang ylang and lemon.)

Like I said, I added more oils, about 2 tbs of coconut oil and cocoa butter, but my hands can handle it!  You can mix and match oils quite easily.  Oh, and these are all natural butters, not processed!  For those allergic to beeswax, a hard lotion can be made with soya.  I’ve experimented with one, but have not had success as yet.  Will post when I do.

May Your Cup Always Be Full,

Stephanie, Emerging Princess

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Water For The Journey

Book Release PartyOctober 25th, 2013
The long-awaited release of Water For The Journey: 156 Days To Freedom. All day givaways and book release party!
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